Why does it feel so wrong, to reach for somethin more?

I hate that I really have no effing idea of how to say what it is that I want..
And I desperately want to say it.
But it's like that cat's got my tongue..
It won't come out.
My hands are tied...
It's like.. I'm trying to explain to a deaf person what music sounds like..
I just can't do it.
So many emotions, wrestling to get out into the world, that none of them are letting the others have their chance to speak.
Frustration, anger, hurt, sadness, regret, joy, bliss, confusion, fear, and most of all love.
Through all of the others, love is the one I feel the most.
Love for my friends.
My family.
For smiles and laughter.
For the sun that came out today.
For the young man who, for some ridiculous reason, captivates my every attention.
For Nathan Bray, who's just one of my best friends.
For Angela, who makes me proud.
For Kate, who is such a strong individual.
I feel like weeping.. because of all these emotions..
Especially the ones that I just can't express.. because I'm not the important one here.
I just want an 'on-off' switch in my brain.. so that I could ignore these.. just for a little while.