I get sick of things we think we think we know.

I refuse to believe it isn't.
It's just harder for some to find than others.
And it always seems to slip away from those who are actually looking..
For some reason, I have this ridiculous dream of having the perfect boyfriend. My perfect boyfriend. Like guy-I'll-marry status.
Maybe I'm just setting my expectations to high... But, if you knew,, if you only knew how boys treat(ed) me, you'd understand why.
I don't even mean to,, it's generally subconscious.

I want him to surprise me with my favorite ice cream on a Sunday night, because I hate those days.
I would make him his favorite dinner and take it to him and serve it to him all professional-like... just for fun :)
He would let me take pictures of him all the time.
We would hold hands in front of people.

This is my most favorite picture. ever.

He wouldn't really care that I am absolutely absurd sometimes.

I would kidnap him at 4 in the morning so that we could go find someplace awesome to watch the sunrise.

He would make me go running with him, and keep pace with my pathetic slow-ness.

We'd pretend to be awkward.. Kay maybe not pretend.

I would let him meet my parents... which is actually something I dread.

He would be so cool that my parents would actually approve.

(Which would be a miracle)

He would know that sometimes, I need to be alone.

My friends would hang out with him, rather than me on occasion.

We would play video games together.
I would make him go hiking with me.
We would be friends with benefits, untraditionally.
We might even go as far as cuddling.
He would take me on dates to the playground, and we would push each other on the swings.

I wouldn't get mad at him for awkwardly being "couply" with me.
We would be obnoxious around children.
I would make him let me wear his clothes.
He would attempt to make me a cake on my birthday.
I would attempt to buy him a gift that he actually wanted for his birthday..


So I pretend that I'm not female sometimes..
Other times I can't ignore it.
I'm a hopeless romantic.
I crave affection.
I want someone who will be my best friend, the way my best friends already are.
I might be asking a lot..
But I don't think I can settle for much less.

I. Am. Not. An. Object.